Literacy outcomes
Following implementation of the strategies: other English genres
The last two writing sample illustrates how continual practice with detailed reading and whole class text patterning can eventually enable all students to write effectively across the curriculum.
Writing sample 7: poem
The following poem was jointly written by two of the weakest students in the project. These students had not been known to write at all before the project began. It was written following a detailed reading of a poem from the novel So Much to Tell You by John Marsden. Marsden’s poem uses metaphor to encode a message that reflects on a personality and relationship. A new poem was then jointly constructed by the whole class, patterned on Marsden’s, and the students were asked to write their own.
Pale as a ghost you walked past
I wondered what its like to die
I waited for time to go past
To see if I would fly
I thought that ghost would come back
But there are things that cannot be
The ghost can touch nothing
There are things I cannot see
- PURPOSE
- poem patterned on reading, using metaphors to encode message
- STAGING
- exemplum genre – Incident and Interpretation
- FIELD
- imaginative use of ghost and death metaphor to reflect on life
- TENOR
- mostly personal, with objective generalisations
- MODE
- towards literary poetry, using alternating rhyme and scanned rhythm – expected stage 4
- PHASES
- two stanzas/phases – events and reflection, realising Incident and Interpretation
- LEXIS
- simple everyday lexis, but used for metaphors and reflections Pale as a ghost, what its like to die, things that cannot be, things I cannot see
- CONJUNCTION
- implicit cause you walked past (so) I wondered, concession But there are things, implicit comparison The ghost can touch nothing (likewise) There are things I cannot see
- REFERENCE
- reference is clear
- APPRAISAL
- judgements Pale as a ghost, can touch nothing, I cannot see used to reflect on life things that cannot be
- GRAMMAR
- grammar is well controlled
- SPELLING
- accurate
- PUNCTATION
- control of letter cases
- PRESENTATION
- control of lines and stanzas
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Although the poem is apparently very simple, a large set of written language resources are used to encode a message about life. This achievement is particularly striking as these students’ literacy skills would be assessed at Stage 1 (Years 1-2) before the project commenced.
Writing sample 8: interpretation
In sample 8 the genre is an interpretation, that is it interprets the message of a text, in this case Steinbeck’s Grapes of Wrath. The interpretation genre was modelled and practised by the whole class over time, and students were then asked to write their own interpretation. The task was to interpret the message of a novel from the perspective of ‘chance’.
The Grapes of Wrath is a story of a poor family living on a farm whose living is destroyed by drought (a natural force). By chance (fate) they are forced to leave their farm to work. In doing so they took a great risk because they had no home and no job, and were going by chance to find these.
When they do find work their labour is exploited through low wages, poor working conditions, inadequate housing and poor quality food. They had not achieved the certainty they had taken a risk for. Only a few had the collective vision to organise (planning) to strike for better conditions. In doing so, however, these people, like the character Tom, take a great risk with their lives. Tom feels any risk is worth it to make life better.
The Grapes of Wrath is a story of how chance can affect a whole generation of people.
- PURPOSE
- interprets message in novel
- STAGING
- message is interpreted through Synopsis, but no Evaluation of the text
- FIELD
- good control over the field of the text, summarising key elements
- TENOR
- objective, but implicit empathy for characters, eg poor family
- MODE
- written mode appropriate for secondary school
- PHASES
- repeated sequence of key events and reflections on chance and risk, concluding with summary of reflections
- LEXIS
- well developed field, eg destroyed by drought (a natural force), labour is exploited through low wages, poor working conditions, inadequate housing and poor quality food, collective vision to organise (planning)
- CONJUNCTION
- good control of consequence By chance, In doing so, however – and comparison like the character Tom
- REFERENCE
- reference is clear – including text reference In doing so…
- APPRAISAL
- good control of objective appraisal, eg a poor family, destroyed by drought, took a great risk, their labour is exploited, Only a few had the collective vision, chance can affect a whole generation
- GRAMMAR
- grammar is well controlled
- SPELLING
- accurate
- PUNCTATION
- control of sentence punctuation and letter cases
- PRESENTATION
- some use of paragraphs
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In some respects sample 8 is not as successful as sample 6 above. This is partly because the task of interpreting a message in a novel is far more complex than writing a story patterned on a reading. On the other hand, this student is able to produce the key elements of synopsis and reflections to interpret the text, using the criteria of ‘chance’ set in the task. The student also has a strong command of the field of the text, is able to construct an argument using written conjunctions, and is able to use objective appraisals appropriately.