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Literacy outcomes

Following implementation of the strategies: stories

The next samples were written independently following systematic implementation of the Reading to Learn strategies. In each case a passage was selected from an accomplished author. Detailed reading strategies were used to tune students into the language patterns that the author used to construct the model text, and with the guidance of the teacher the whole class then jointly wrote a new text patterned closely on the text they had been reading. Students were then asked to write their own text using the same language patterns they had read and written as a whole class.

Writing sample 5: low range

The first sample 5 shows the gains that a very weak student can make after detailed reading and whole class text patterning. The passage they have read is from a short story (title not identified). This student was among those writing at the level of sample 2 before the project started.

The hitch hiker!
We came out of the garage on to the highway and I jammed my foot on the accelerator. The big car raced past other traffic like they were standing still. In around 10 seconds or so we leaped to ninety.
‘Lovely,’ he muttered. ‘Beautiful, keep driving.’
I had the accelerator squished like a pancake against the floor and I held like a pancake.
‘100!’ he cried ‘…105…110…115! Go on don’t slack off .’
I was in the outside lane and we flew past several cars like they were still.
‘A hundred and twenty!’ my passenger screamed, cheering as though it was the last time he was in a speeding car.
Suddenly, I heard a rattling sound, which was soft, but grew louder. It got so loud that it felt like my ear drums were going to burst. A tyre had busted.
I looked at the ragged wheel.
‘Oh damn. A tyre busted.’ I said.

PURPOSE
write a short anecdote patterned on a model text
STAGING
well developed Remarkable event stage, with Reaction signalled by Suddenly
FIELD
partly borrowed from model story, with imaginative elements
TENOR
reader engaged with accelerating action, and feelings expressed in reactions
MODE
many written language features, expected Stage 4 level
PHASES
builds excitement through accelerating events, and intensifying reactions, followed by problem and reaction
LEXIS
constructs familiar field through consistent strings of lexis: garage–highway–accelerator–big car–traffic–standing still–10 seconds–ninety– driving– the floor–outside lane–speeding car–tyre–ragged wheel
CONJUNCTION
sequenced by series of events, and time themes In around ten seconds, Suddenly
REFERENCE
reference is clear
APPRAISAL
much use of appraisal using specialised lexis: jammed my foot, raced past and similes: like they were standing still, squished like a pancake, as though it was the last time, like my ear drums were going to burst, and feelings in reaction phases: ‘Lovely,’ he muttered, screamed, cheering, Oh damn
GRAMMAR
grammar is well controlled
SPELLING
accurate
PUNCTATION
control of sentence and dialogue punctuation
PRESENTATION



Although there are elements of this text that are still not strong, such as the repetition of tyre busted in the last two lines, and a weak reaction at the end, this student has control over a host of written language resources, such as reaction phases to engage reader, constructing a coherent field through consistent lexis, time themes to signal changes, similes and descriptive appraisals, and the complex punctuation of dialogue.

Writing sample 6: high range

The next sample was written after a detailed reading and whole class rewriting of a passage from the same Paul Jennings story as in sample 3 above. This time the writer is able to use many of language resources from the model text, while producing an original story.

A little way off from the biggest car pile in the wreckers we were scratching through some old car parts for our new go-cart. Tom had just found the fourth wheel. He pulled it out. It made a lot of noise for a tyre. But after he pulled it out the noise continued. It sounded like someone pushing a car over but no-one would be strong enough to do that, unless it was a ghost.

I looked at Tom, Wack! Something had hit him in the head. He fell to the ground. The tyre rim that had hit him came from the same direction as the noise. This was starting to freak me out. I wanted the headlights of a car to turn on so I could see what the noise was. I went to run but then I thought about Tom. I couldn’t leave him here and let the ghost get him. I looked over at the pile and saw a head. It was hanging loose from a blurry body.

I grabbed Tom and dragged him into the nearest car. I jumped in but couldn’t get Tom in quickly enough. The ghost looked directly towards him. I ducked down behind the car door… (extract)

PURPOSE
accomplished narrative (extract)
STAGING
Complication signalled by time theme But after he pulled it out… – well developed Evaluation This was starting to freak me out. I wanted the headlights of a car to turn on so I could see what the noise was… – temporaryResolution predicting a further Complication
FIELD
plot is partly borrowed from a read story, with well-developed imaginative elements
TENOR
reader engaged with build-up of tension and action, and feelings expressed in Evaluation
MODE
a more written story, expected Stage 4–5 level
PHASES
builds tension through worsening problems, followed by reactions, temporary solution and further problem
LEXIS
imaginative use of new go-cart to find wheels that ghost throws – tied to context of wreckers, car lights and nearest car
CONJUNCTION
sequenced by series of events (using Jennings’ strategy), time theme signals Complication
REFERENCE
reference is clear – including text reference This was starting to freak me out
APPRAISAL
much use of appraisal, eg biggest car pile, no-one would be strong enough, Wack!, starting to freak me out, I couldn’t leave him, couldn’t get Tom in quickly enough
GRAMMAR
grammar is well controlled
SPELLING
accurate
PUNCTATION
control of sentence punctuation and letter cases
PRESENTATION
some use of paragraphs


Detailed reading and joint rewriting of a story by an accomplished author has enabled this student to independently write a highly successful story. Continual practice of these activities over time, with a range of texts, will soon make such students successful independent readers and writers across the curriculum. These activities rapidly overcome the problems created by standard classroom activities such as personal story writing and modelled writing.

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These materials are provided for research purposes and may contain opinions that are not shared by the Board of Studies NSW.